day one forty nine or something…you gotta see these haikus. Number three will shock you!!

furry praisechewy

Chewbacca’s so great
dude has been on fire since
his Wookiee season

low country

hey “The Netherlands”
or is it “Holland?” “The Dutch”?
pick a fucking name

shut up, stupid

if you’re not funny
or all that interesting
at least be quiet

day one hundred eighteen – musical instruments that need to be taken down a peg


the “grand” piano??
so what, you’re black and shiny
so’s Patrick Ewing

while I am at it
what is with “piano black”?
sounds like a Bond girl


fucking piccolos??
look guys, its a tiny flute!
get over yourself


goddamn harpsichords
you make the worst sound on earth

O.P.P. volume one

from time to time people submit haikus they have written themselves.  this is sort of a contest I guess, but I haven’t thought it through yet.  so keep sending them in, and enjoy this first ever installment of down with O.P.P. – other people’s poetry!

Bob Fingerman

crack addict hooker
gettin’ her pimp damn angry
’cause she’s some high cooze

Ken Kie (title: “Haiku”)

First you start with five.
Then seven more syllables.
Finally, five more.

Mrs. Hicks

Lesbian haiku:
Anger in a paper bag
Writhing and muffled

congratulations you are all eligible for the monthly drawing!  by which I mean I will be drawing a picture about your haiku and mailing it to you.